Sunday, August 7, 2011

Perfect Love and Perfect Trust?

The phrase “perfect love and perfect trust”, is tossed around a lot in Witch circles. But What does this actually mean? In a ideal world it means that you work with a circle or group of fellow practitioners with affection, while possessing complete and utter confidence in them. That they will be honest, will have your back, that they have your best interests at heart, and that you will have no reason to fear any magick that may occur while in ritual together.

The words “perfect love and perfect trust” are also used as an answer. At an initiation ceremony. The seeker is blindfolded, and bound at the wrists and led into a ritual circle by their sponsor or mentor. The initiate is stopped at the threshold of the circle by the point of an athame, and challenged with  the following line, “It is better to rush upon this blade, than to enter the circle with fear in your heart. How do you enter?”  Classically the answer is, In perfect love and perfect trust.

Have you ever really stopped and thought about the phrase “perfect love and perfect trust”?  Because, there are times when you have to question and you should challenge authority, and not simply follow. Just because your High Priest/ess, friends, business colleague, boss, project leader, or local Witch community leader tells you to trust and to follow them blindly, does not mean you should start channeling your inner lemming. 

This goes for the mundane world as well as the Witch world. If all of your instincts are screaming that something is wrong at your job, and that things are not as they seem, and that someone else has hopes that you, or your project will fail. Or that it would benefit their own projects or job to stand by and watch you fail… Then you should listen to that inner voice, telling you that something is wrong.

If your stomach flips, or your gut tightens, while that inner voice is saying indignantly, “Hey, that is not right!” That is your survival instinct. Ignore that inner voice at your own peril. Bottom line? You should TRUST your own instincts and LOVE yourself enough to believe in your right to question authority, and/or to stand up for yourself.

Why should you gift someone with your trust if they have done absolutely nothing to earn it?  Why should you continue to trust an individual when they lie over and over again?  Why should you continue to believe in someone when you begin to see that this person has their own agenda? And who would be so foolish as to find themselves in that situation?

Well, we all would. We all hope for the best and wish that the people we work with in both magickal or mundane settings will be honorable, truthful and trustworthy.

Perfect Love is a fragile entity. It takes just the right environment to grow and to blossom and to thrive. With care and time- it does become strong. Perfect Trust is a hopeful thing, but it can be brutalized and or trampled on by other peoples egos, politics, agendas and jealousies.

Trust and love must be earned. It is never to be demanded. Trust is a gift and it takes time to unwrap it. Why would you give away your affection or your trust to another- just because someone else tells you that they are reputable, or a professional? Answer: You should not.

When it comes to Perfect Love and Perfect Trust, here is my advice: Love yourself enough to trust in your own decisions. Trust that the instincts you posses will help you to avoid, or to minimize problems both personally and professionally. And when in doubt, stop and consider the players, their agendas, and the overall situation, and then start asking questions. Don’t stop until you uncover the truth.

No one can demand that you “love” them or that you “trust” them without proving to you, by their actions, that they are worthy of that honor. Without love and trust there is no respect.

And perfect love, and perfect trust, has to be earned.

Respect yourself enough to ask questions and to stand up for yourself. You are worth it!

Blessed be, Ellen

4 comments:

  1. I've always kept in my mind that when I say "In perfect love & perfect trust" I'm speaking to the Goddess & God - that I have perfect love & perfect trust in our relationship.

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  2. What a wonderful post! Trust and love are words that are easily thrown around by those who do not want to earn them. Certainly self-love and trust is the very important first step.

    Teresa

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